Rely on Your Faith

Have you lost your faith after experiencing trauma?

I know I had. When I was a child I would ask God in my prayers to save me from my abusive father and my prayers were never heard. I was angry and went many years without any faith to help guide me through life, especially during the difficult times.

It wasn’t until I opened my heart again in my 40’s—in desperation—that I opened a bible and began to read. It was a night that changed me completely. Here’s an excerpt from my book, The Lotus Tattoo:

“My friend also recommended a book on how to read the Bible, and once I finished that, I went out and bought a Bible for myself and started reading. It was research to me. I was trying to find an understanding of who God was and wondering if I could ever feel his presence around me. One night as I sat on my couch, I was drunk and feeling alone and sorry for myself as I read my Bible. I read the words but felt nothing. It was just a story, like reading a novel. Frustrated, I stopped and asked God to come back into my life. I begged. ‘Please, God, if you are there, please let me know you are with me. Please, God, if you exist, let me know. Show me a sign— anything please!’ It was probably the alcohol, but suddenly, I felt an overwhelming feeling of love and light and all-knowing sense that God existed and he was surrounding me. It was warm and inviting, just like I had hoped for. I held the Bible against my chest and cried, a hard cry, rocking back and forth saying loudly, ‘Thank you! Thank you, God, for coming back to me. I know you are here. Thank you!’ I stopped reading the Bible that night and never picked it up again; nor did I go back to church. But I did start praying every night. And I prayed every night the same prayer: ‘Please, God, please help me be peaceful and calm tomorrow. Help me get through the day without anger or depression. Help me find my happiness.’ And I continued to talk with God often and ask a lot of questions. While I knew God was with me, I wasn’t sure who he was or how I fit into his plan, and I needed answers.”

What or Who is God?

God can mean many things to many people and no one person is right or wrong in their beliefs. God appears in many forms to all of us. What’s important is that you have faith and trust in your beliefs.

If you have lost your faith in god, why not change your beliefs? What you have got to lose? If you are experiencing the impacts of trauma in any way, you might feel that God has let you down. But know that you are not alone in all of this. God is still with you—you just have to open up your heart and let him back in.

◦Trust that you are you being guided.

◦Be grateful for the good things in your life.

◦Know that God has helped you get there.

Know what questions to ask in prayer

For many of us, when we pray—I know I used to do this—I would ask questions that were negative, coming from a victim-thinking mindset.

◦Why me?

◦What have I done?

◦What did I do to deserve this?

Yes, I was a victim at first. But I was stuck in this mindset which didn’t allow me to heal. These questions held me back in the past and kept me from moving forward.

Instead, ask the positive questions

What can I learn from this?

Can you give me a new perspective?

So what do I do now?

Listen to your intuition to hear God’s response. The first thought that comes to your mind, regardless of how crazy it sounds, is what your guidance is.

Then take that information and learn and lead. Take action and lead with this new information to heal yourself, move forward, or guide others.

God is in all of us, even those of us that have been through the most traumatic of experiences. God has not left us, we just need to open up our hearts, ask the right questions and listen.

Here’s a song of faith that I know you will absolutely love! Crank it up and feel God’s love! Nneka - God of Mercy